How to Theme-Park

(And not be a total tool) I recently joined a few connoisseur groups, following the parks on social media I frequent often. I found that these people, my people, understood my somewhat odd fascination with theme parking in general and subsequently, do not judge me for it; unlike the rest … Continue Reading How to Theme-Park

Hollywood vs. Me

I recently turned on a movie, where in the hot Hollywood Dad was telling a story to his equally gorgeous Hollywood plucky offspring, about how he met her mother and subsequently, how they fell in love and made such a perfect child. Sounds a little dumb and I would agree … Continue Reading Hollywood vs. Me

Dear Mandy….Vol. 1

Hallo! So I have had some folks send me emails asking for sarcastic advice per my personality issues. Keep in mind, this advice is purely sarcastic. I cannot give real advice for the following reasons: I is not qualified. Really and for realsies. Closest thing I am to a therapist is … Continue Reading Dear Mandy….Vol. 1

Dear Summer

Dear Summer, Hello. How have you been? How is camp? Have you gotten to swim or take a vacation? I haven’t lately.  Wanna know why? Because you seem to think that summer = it’s okay to fry mo’effers to deaf. Shit. Are you mad at me or something? I don’t … Continue Reading Dear Summer

You’re Allowed!

Mom guilt. It’s everywhere. It’s with you when you wake up and forget to pack their snack because coffee seemed more important to make first. It’s there when you are at home while they are at school and at 2 o’clock,  you realize it was purple fu@&%ng shirt day at … Continue Reading You’re Allowed!